Some Fragments To Clean Up And Dispose Of

• Change continues to loom ahead like a towering cluster of black clouds, threatening rain. I think change causes anxiety or excitement because change is a transition from the routine to the unknown.
  
• Fear or delight in the unknown depends on a person's charge. Contemplation of the unknown inevitably causes scenario contemplation and contingency plans and all sorts of theories and stories unfold of what will take place and what will happen. A negative charge will lead to terrifying visions of failure and catastrophe. That's where the fear comes in. A positive charge will be the amusing contemplation of possibilities and potential for growth and expansion. Take walking into a huge, dense forest, never before visited. The negative will say, "Jesus, what kind of awful creatures and follies lurk here?" The positive will say, "Well, perhaps there is treasure or some sort of hidden paradise."
  
• I happen to be negatively charged in confronting the current unknown, unfortunately. And so it is a source of discomfort, and not anticipation. No, there may be a mixture of both. Of the positive and negative. Maybe there is some anticipation involved.
• I fear that some of this philosophy has over balanced-against the poetry, but I am slowly recovering some of it as well. I grasped philosophical reasoning, rationality, and though I am grateful for what I learned, I did not care for the world it invites, therefore I will slowly let some of it go, and retain what I want to use.
• When a person's foundations crumble away and they are left floating, they tend towards nihilism, the floating ideology, the nothing. It is an uncomfortable state for a person used to foundations, though it is hard to be truly and purely nihilistic.